Please help

I really dont know what to think right now …

I’m two weeks late for my period and to be honest, I am scared to death.
I was in the ICU for DKA in september 2010 and i can’t shake the doctor telling me over and over “You can NOT get pregnant right now” I’m terrified … I’m buying a test tomorrow, but what If I am??

To be honest, my brother had a baby last year and I used to go with the mother to appointments and I remember talking about how I wonder if I would be considered high risk if i have ever become pregnant now that im diabetic ( i was just diagnosed at the time) and some woman in the waiting room told me to watch the movie “steel magnolias” …

I watched it and to be honest … I’m terrified! What do i do if i am in fact pregnant?! I’m in a small town i pa and cant even get a pcp … would it be right if i got an abortion?! Everyone keeps telling me i shoud … to be honest, i KNOW i couldnt do it … i just … i couldnt…

I know im projecting a lot … but if im pregnant then i want the best for my child … thats what i want more than to be honest is to be a mother, but i dont want to bring a child into this world that is physically challenged due to my disease …

ugh … i dont know what to think … i have been diabetic for over two years now and have never seen a doctor … i have no idea what im doing … im just frightened, alone, and scared … i want what is best for my unborn child (if thats fact)

what do i do?!


What you are going through is a very serious issue, made more so by the fact that you are diabetic. If you feel that you haven’t been able to get your diabetes under control until this point, it might prove very difficult for you to do so once you are pregnant. If you want “what is best for you child”, running high blood sugars during pregnancy will be very detrimental.

It looks like you need guidance through this, but nobody on Tudiabetes or even in your immediate community can or should tell you whether or not to keep the baby. That is your decision and yours alone. Have you considered talking to a therapist, or finding a kind doctor who specializes in diabetes care, that can help you make an informed and realistic decision?

I wish you luck, and be true to your heart through it all

As a T1, you simply CAN NOT go two years without seeing a doctor. If you’re pregnant, you’ll need to see a doctor very regularly. Whatever is going on with you (pregnant or not) you need to fix this never seeing a doctor thing.

Huge hugs!!! You’re not alone – it just seems that way. You have every diabetic on this site wishing you well and ready to help you with advice and ideas.

Here on TuD and out there you’ll find who says yes and who says no!, you’ll find some helping words and even some irritating, but I agree with Frankie: That is your decision and yours alone. And as in every great decision you take all feelings, informations, words, news etc. then mix well head & heart and at last JUMP! and be sure: you made the best ever jump!
(as a foreigner, futhermore a man, I hope I made it clear that I’m on your side whatever you’ll decide :slight_smile:
All my best

First of all, relax, you can’t change anything that’s already happened. You can however move forward now! I am a fierce supporter of free choice and believe It’s your choice on what to do. The best way to decide if you are conflicted… flip coin, if it’s heads and you like the flip, you’re done. If you say to yourself, best of 3… then just pick other option because that’s what you really wanted anyway. Haha, ok seriously though, there’s no easy answers, but you are not alone. Just imagine everyone here is walking along with you wherever you go. While we can’t be there physically, we are in thought.

Regarding real world issues… have you looked into planned parenthood or other local places? Sadly, many people think of them as abortion only, but they are not! If nothing else, they can possibly get you started with doctor visits and maybe referrals to other services.

Not to pry into personal business but it does take two to tango as they say… if you are positive, what kind of support can you expect from the father? Getting married because of pregnancy is not the greatest answer these days of course, but there could be other ways he can help? Not saying or suggesting you can’t or shouldn’t do this alone if you want or need to, just as a father myself, I can honestly tell you there’s absolutely nothing I would not do for my child. I would like to hope most fathers or potential fathers feel the same.

Regarding diabetes… Meh. DKA in Sept seems scary, but it’s not that big a deal on the grander scale of things. I dropped my a1c by 3 points in 3 months so it’s possible to get into good control with some effort on your part. I would urge you to start looking into finding a doctor regardless of pregnancy or not. best not to dwell on current or past, concentrate on moving forward! You can always find a friend here to help you along the way. I wish you the best in deciding, you’ve reached out here already, so it shows hope and willingness to do it. You’ll be fine! Also, there’s an “oh baby!” Group on here that could be great place to find ideas or resources…

so, lets start with you simply haveto see a doctor, regardless of whether or not you are pregnant. secondly, i have been diabetic for 36 years. i have 3 wonderful, healthy children. 28, 25, and 21. none of them are diabetic and none of them have any health problems. they were all born with normal birth weights and no complications. yes, i did have them all very young (i started when i was 20), and i was not the best diabetic in the world. the times were different 28 years ago…i was on 1 shot/day and really did not take the best care of myself. basically what i am saying is that if you take care of yourself, see a doctor, listen to them, and really take this seriously, then there is no real reason not to have a baby, ifthat’s what you want to do. regardless of the decision you make if you arepregnant, you simply must find a doctor. again, being diabetic for so long, and not really taking care of myself for most of the early years, i have suffered some complications. laser surgery numerous times for retinopathy, nueropathy, PAD(peripheral arterial disease), i have recently had triple bypass surgery, i smoked for many, many years, but quit 7 years ago. i have high cholesterol and high blood pressure, BUT I COULD HAVE AVOIDED ALL THIS BY LOOKING AFTER MYSELF!!! i believe i brought alot of this on myself by eating and drinking whatever i wanted. not checking my sugars, and not taking enough insulin for most of those early years. you are young and none of this has to happen to you if you take control of your diabetes and not let it take control of you!! best of luck with whatever you decide, and remember it is your choice to make!

#1 go to a doctor about your diabetes now.

in case you need help w/ insurance

Planned Parenthood of the Susquehanna Valley
137 South Pugh Street #7, State College, PA - (814) 867-7778
You can get a pregnancy test there, speak to their counselors about next steps and options, get a referral to other doctors (e.g. an ob/gyn who can work with you to get your diabetes under control vis a vis your pregnancy, if you are pregnant) and if you are not pregnant, they can help you get your birth control locked in to prevent future scares until you’re ready to conceive.

They’re about an hour from you, I believe. If nothing else you can ask them for a referral to a good clinic closer to home.

If I were you, I’d focus on figuring out whether or not you’re pregnant and take it one step at a time from there.

Big, deep breaths!!!

Try not to stress… You may not even be pregnant… One of the symptoms I had of diabetes before being diagnosed, was irregular menstuation. The fact that you haven’t seen a doctor in a long time, and it’s very possible your BG is out of control, can deffinately contribute to ‘woman problems’… But as others have said below, just make sure you get to a doctor ASAP… If you are pregnant, you need to be healthy for yourself and a youngster…
good luck to you!!!

Ok first off sit down breath in, breath out. A few times if you need to…now get that test and then find out for sure if your going to have a baby or not. I will speak from my past 23 years ago when I got p with my 1st daughter and scared wasn’t the word for it! If you are get yourself to a DR ASAP. My daughter was a surprise to me too. I wasn’t even thinking of theslightest possibility that that would happen to me. I know how scared you are right now but now if you are start getting control RIGHT NOW! You want to be there and healthy for your child right?

I was adviced to get an abortion both times I got pg (my girls are 17 months apart) but I didn’t and after the hard times I had at first (Hey I got on the pump back then for being a high risk pregancy) My oldest now a Type 1 herself has had 3 kids (all NOT planned and she was running a high bs with all 3 when she found out about them)

First off, go see a doctor. Secondly, find out if you are pregnant. I do NOT believe in abortion, so I would certainly tell you to keep your child. It is amazing what a mother will do for her child. I think that once you get to a doctor and get on a program for your diabetes that it will be easier to “listen” to the doctor then it ever has been because you will be doing it for your baby (of course if you are pregnant). Remember, if you are pregnant, that your baby already loves you and depends on you! Best of luck to you. YOU are too important to not take care of yourself.

Firstly, you will need to confirm that you are pregnant. Second, remember that not all doctors actually know what they are talking about. Millions of diabetic women have had babies, some several, throughout the world and throughout the ages and most have survived - even before knowledge of caring for a pregnant diabetic mother. Now they know so much more than then and can keep a careful eye on you and perhaps induce your labour when the time comes to prevent the baby from becoming too big!

Don’t even think about an abortion at this stage. September is a long time ago anyway. As I have said, doctors are not gods and they do not know everything there is to know about anything!

I wish you well. I think you need to see a doctor before long anyway to find out how best to treat yourself, pregnant or not!

Everybody has given you really good advice. My two cents are that having a baby, if you are pregnant is not anything like any movie out there, especially, Steel Magnolias, which is the absolute worst, inaccurate and horrible rendition of what we face currently. Yes, if you are pregnant, and you make the decision to go forward with the pregnancy, it is difficult, but also, probably the most rewarding thing you can do. in your life. My pregnancies were 15 and 20 years ago. I took the best care of myself for my whole life, because the motivation was for the baby. I cannot explain it, but I urge you to see a doctor, find a high risk specialist ob/gyn even if they are far away from you. It is an amazing journey. Women who have diabetes and are mothers, are on a special journey. Good luck.