Sugar Free
Oh I hate those words. Sugar free is what my aunt called her cake. She took meticulous care to bake a cake with no sugar, in those days she used saccharin as her sugar substitute, she mixed it carefully and even used it in her whipped cream frosting. Decorated with coconut the white cake looked so good. Oh my goodness that stuff even tasted good. Wait Ricky you took a small little bit don’t you want a second piece? It is after all sugar free.
Sugar free, it was on the package of Apple Butter at the market. Deep and rich, it smelled so good when the lady was handing out the taste on the cracker. Lots of diabetics buy this because it is sugar free. We use a special process and blend it with cinnamon and sweeten it with sucrose. It is sugar free and it is so good you may want three jars to take home.
Sugar Free, this chicken hasn’t got a single bit of sugar in it. All I do is take the chicken and dip it in buttermilk and then I roll it in these cornflake crumbs. I figure no more than half a cup of corn flakes for each breast and then I deep fry it. When it comes out I sprinkle some paprika on it to give it that little kick. See it is sugar free, so you can have as much as you want.
Sugar Free, That is what the package said of the chocolate candy laced with sorbitol. It is true, if you eat too much of this you may have a bad side effect, but it is sugar free. In fact even if the taste is downright awful it is still chocolate, I mean what do you want? After all it is sugar free.
Oh this whole meal is sugar free. Enjoy the mashed potatoes, fried zucchini, croutons, breads, tarts, and puddings it is all sugar free. Take more, eat more, enjoy more, it is all sugar free.
Every single diabetic who has been one for more than a month has had these or similar circumstances, and if you have not, get ready for it this holiday season. It happens at Churches, Cub Scout dinners, little league gatherings, Brownie troop gatherings, and everything in between. It will happen at family dinners and at the supermarket checkout.
Every one of these is either innocent (most family members mean well) or subversive (meaning that manufacturers are trying to capture the multimillion dollar, diet and diabetic market. Those products may contain the usual suspects, (Fructose, Sorbitol, Corn Syrup, Mannitol, Xylitol, Isomalt, Hydrogenated Starch Hydrolysates or Sugar Alcohol) or some kind of more normal sounding product (Honey, Molasses, Evaporated cane juice, or Sucrose), they are sugar like and the body responds in the short or long term like they are sugar.
Even worse, even if food contains just a small amount of these sweeteners it is carbohydrate that really counts. We all know a product, like my grandmothers chicken for example, that contains loads of carbohydrates is just as difficult to cover as one that contains Corn Syrup. Or as my mother once told my grandmother, “listen lady fix me something that is carbohydrate free and I will eat it”.
Oh yeah I am still looking for carbohydrate free food. Cheese I believe is the best one I know. So this fall when Aunt Margret says pass the sugar free cookies, hold your tongue and pass them along. Just be really careful eating one. Instead you might say pass the cheddar or the turkey. But do stay away from my cousins famous sugar free, sugar cured ham. That stuff is gross; no I mean it, that stuff is gross.
What are you favorite sugar free items to avoid?
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Rick