today starts the birthday and holiday season for our family. my husband is the first to kick it off. we have two b-days in september (including me…hee hee hee…) two in october, two in november, two in december, one in january, february we get a break, march i think is one, april is free and may there r three. heaven knows how the holidays r going to go this year. i’m hoping to hold off hanna’s first cold for as long as possible but i feel better today that i can handle it. some of this is making sense and i think i’ve lightened up a little. lol the holidays r going to be interesting but i think we’ll manage. it’s amazing that once people find out u have someone close to u w/ diabetes how many people seem to come out of the woodwork w/ the same condition. i am also finding that it’s better if we keep things simple and forthright w/ hanna. she’s pretty smart for a two year old and she seems to accept things more if ur just honest w/ her. she may not like it but she deals better than if u try and deceive her. smart little cookie. i only wish i had half her strength. the shots and finger picks and diet seem to be old hat to her now. i have barely wrapped my head around the situation yet and it’s old news for her already. it amazes me. and she’s starting to use some of the lingo when we’re out. it’s cute. she even ordered herself a diet coke the other day! the waitress was appalled that we had our daughter on a “diet”. when i explained it was not a diet to lose weight but for her diabetes, she became quiet. i’ve notices that people tend to do that when they find out. i’m having a hard time dealing w/ that also. i can’t see this as a disease or disability. i guess i have a different definition. i can’t even call it an illness like some people like to call it. it just is what it is. i don’t know. i haven’t fully allowed myself to think about it. i’m not ready. i let it out a little at a time. i think if i just sat down and processed it all at one time i’d never stop crying. someone told me that the most important advice they could give (aside from medical stuff) was never look back. at first i was perplexed but now it makes sense. today is today and tomorrow is just that. i take pride in how far she’s come and humble myself w/ the fact we very well could have lost her that awful night this showed itself but i move on. and sometimes people make me feel bad about that. amazing…
