Depression getting to me

ive been diagnosed with depression for 21 years now. been on various medications as well. well as of late ive been overeating or not eat at all. i know its not good for my diabetes but it seems that my brain is already taking over. I feel pretty much alone and no one understands the importance of me taking care of my diabetes. i dont know how people get through the day. i feel that i have no support system either. i try to tell people about my mental illness and that i need to not overeat or even not eat enough. i need the meals. How do i get the people i care about understand that i need their support in everything? how do i get myself through the day without wanting to go back to bed? i just feel a bit lost and invisable. i feel like that no one in my life really cares as no one really checks in. and i need help with them to do that. How do you guys deal? Thanks for reading. I feel a bit better knowing i can write this

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@Amy2 - That stinks. Sorry to hear that.

Would it be possible for you to add 30 minutes of exercise every day? Any kind of exercise. Do it whether you want to or not.

It is not going to “cure” anything but it might put enough of a dent in that would allow you to make progress in different areas?

If there is anyway you can do this there are likely no downsides and the potential for significant upside is quite real.

Here is a link to an article from the Mayo Clinic that might offer some helpful advice. Again - nothing that is a cure or any magic bullet but if provides even a little help it might be worth giving a try?

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/in-depth/depression-and-exercise/art-20046495

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thanks…i cant walk too far. my legs done work like it use to…i walk with a cane as well…i guess i could clean my apt. that is some exercise i can do. ill read the article as well.

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Cleaning is doing two things at the same time !!! Bonus !!!

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i guess ill do that then. its the only way to get some exercise in. i did walk around the mall with my boyfriend yesterday when we went shopping…my legs ended up hurting and got muscle spasms in my back. but i did get a wee bit of walking in as we were shopping. but i think cleaning may be the best solution

@Amy2
Another idea for exercise would be to consult with a good Physical Therapist. They may have a variety of out-of-the-box thoughts on types of exercise that would be personally applicable to you.

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ooo i didnt think about that! maybe something i can do while i do stuff on the computer. great ideas

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I googled in chair exercise and a lot of links turned up. This set of easy exercises looked a good starting point, do try to do them at least once a day:

https://www.grandparents.com/health-and-wellbeing/exercise-and-de-stress/chair-exercises

Also it would be a good idea to put some music on, cheerful music affects the brain waves.
Good luck.

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i do put music on every once in a while…only helps for a small time. I just havent had the desire to put it on all the time. ill look at the link you showed me with the chair exercises. i may be able to do a few of them

Amy,
I am so sorry you have been struggling so long with your depression. I was in that black hole for a very long time. Medications didn’t help and there were days, I would get up, get the kids off to school and than crawl back into bed. Even with piles of clothes screaming at me, bathrooms that needed scrubbing, kitchen needing to be cleaned. It was brutal everyday to know how much I needed to do and I just couldn’t drag myself out of bed to do it. Yes, I did go to work and yes I did to laundry but only when I had no choice but do it.
I did finally get help and used cognitive behavior therapy. I had to realize I wasn’t a failure (diabetes kinda sets us up for that core belief) and that I was good enough (diabetes kinds sets us up for that core belief). I just never felt I was good enough and every “bad” number that showed up and a lot did, it just reinforced those core beliefs.
So between therapy and some walking, things started coming around. I still to this day don’t think my family realize how dark and deep that hole was that I was in. And as much as they are there for me every day, I know they don’t get the day in and day out beating we can sometimes take with this disease. And I also discovered that while I had people to talk to with my diabetes support groups who do get it, I have to do this on my own. It is my disease and I have to live with my choices. I hope you can find the support you are looking for. I know the exercise is so very tough. With the depression and than the physical challenges, but it really is one of the best things for depression and diabetes for that matter. Good luck and please continue asking for help. I hope you can find a support group that can give you some diabetes support. We get it!

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hi Sally…i have the same issue with the cleaning. i had my boyfriend help me with my kitchen as i just couldnt do it on my own. I did my bathroom on my own as its a small one. I cant get myself to clean everything else. the only thing i could do really is take care of my cat as she helps me with a few things. she is my baby. i may neglect a few things time to time for her and i end up feeling bad but frustrated at my boyfriend as he makes me feel bad. I dont think anyone in my life right now realizes how i am truly feeling. and i need to figure out how to tell people hey this is whats going on, be there for me at least. i see a therapist. i feel better after talking to her. i actually cant wait to see her. she helps me with other things too besides talking. sigh its a never ending cycle

Amy,
Know this, its good to share and your not alone. Certainly there is a huge emotional component that Diabetes includes that does not get formally addressed! Unless we call attention to it or post on a site like this where we may have walked a similar path.It is a very hard path and do not doubt others may not understand. You must find those who do and just try to “get better” or to a better place. I find walking helpful but understand it may not be right for every one. Accept my best wishes. And know I cant agree enough the challenge of eating better is a steep hill.Keep your dukes up and you can be a winner!

i had a neuro psych eval and the diagnosis is major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder along with ADHD. everything makes sense. It is nice to know there is a group for our well being. It allows me to talk about hey i feel this way today. It is hard to get others to understand this is what is going on please be supportive as i go through a rough time. i know again i need to eat or stop overeating. i can be a winner if i can get through this. its just a rough patch. diabetes sucks big time. i know i need to manage it in a good way. the only person that does understand a lot is my best friend. she wrote on my white board you are worth it. it is nice she wrote that on there. i need to push along i guess. i will make it through right?

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Yes, you will make it through.

Yes, if you try, you will find the strength to succeed.

thanks…i hope i can find a way. it may take some time…i go to therapy and that helps to talk. we have a change of plans now that my neuro-psych eval came back. i have major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. I was also diagnosed with ADHD. so i have a lot on my plate at the moment

i hope so…it seems right now it doesnt feel like ill have the strength. maybe once i see my dr it can be that way

Depression can be a lonely ugly beast. And no one really gets it unless they have been there. I found no joy in anything. All my hobbies and interests went away and my bed was always calling. I could sleep all night and turn around and sleep all day. It was my escape.
I finally did some cognitive behavior therapy. And just tried to do one change. I didn’t try to fix everything right away. Just one thing. My first was not to climb back into bed after the kids went to school. Instead, I walked around the block and than got my scrapbooking supplies out and started back up with one of my favorite pastimes. There were days that bed would be a rear me but I really tried to push through. And I had a friend that started walking with me, so there was someone else counting on me.
Amy, my dear, I so feel where you are at, but you can do this and you can find happiness again. Just take it one day at a time and little baby steps. And celebrate each little success. If you get up each morning and go downstairs and just sit outside instead of climbing back into bed, celebrate it as a success. And just pick one thing that will give you the biggest bang for your buck. And celebrate when you nail it. Hang in there and keep fighting. And letting your love ones know, that you are trying & May need some support, might give some extra help as you fight through this.
I find when you let people know how many things effect your diabetes, they start to realize how challenging it can be. Be happy! You deserve it!

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i do try…or at least i need to do a better job with it. i had a success in calling a drs office to make an appt that took me months to get the nerve to call. And it turns out she has an appt for tomorrow which means i can get it out of the way and done and over with instead of waiting. I hate waiting. now if i can just call my dentist office to make the appt with them. that causes me to be anxious. i do take a nap during the day to refresh myself otherwise im in bed at 6p and awake in the middle of the night. so a small nap helps me stay up until 11 so i can sleep throughout the night. but i do work hard in not going back to my bed. i should be glad i dont live in a studio anymore. that was the hard part as the bed was just right there. so im working on that. i did take a walk around the mall today. i got my coffee while i was at it. i hope my hobbies will return. i think that will take time. who knows. i got excited when i accomplished in cleaning my kitchen. it still has a wee bit more work to it but at least i can walk in it and my sink is almost cleared out. i know baby steps but what kind of baby steps. this is what im trying to figure out. i do need ppl to understand what i am going through and be there when i need it. encouragement really as i can do this, what can i do to help, etc. with the support system i can begin to know i can count on ppl. I never really had a support system all these years. so it needs to be now otherwise ill still feel worthless. my clinician upped my zoloft so we will see if that will work. ill be asking my other dr to put me on a different meds for the ADHD then what im on now as what im on now keeps me awake during the day but doesnt help with the ADHD (i was daignosed 2 days ago)…so i need the pieces of that to fit to help me. as everyone has been saying, ill get there somehow.

Well done, you are doing so well! Hugs, Maureen