I am told Im not alone

I went to the doctor today after a summer of avoidance. Depression and guilt have become a constant blanket lately and I needed help. I hate how it costs SO much to take care of myself when my family has other bills and things to pay for such as our mortgage and electric bills. I rationed my insulin this summer which caused sugars to rise to above 600 most of the time.

So now I am seeking help from my doctor and trying to dig my way out of this hole i put myself in. My doctor told me that I am not alone in my struggles and there is no such thing as a good diabetic or a bad one. Its time to start again and refocus and not ration.

Hoping i can use this spot to reflect, share, vent, and discover.


you might find some resources here

I am also rationing meds - but not insulin. I’m not going to have health insurance for the next 3 months, so I get it. I had 3 friends this summer give me some insulin, and I had been getting samples from my endo when I saw him.

you might be able to use the Walmart insulins, which are mentioned in this thread

You are definitely not alone. One way or the other we all go through similar, and sometimes even the same, struggles. All of this is challenging in more ways than anyone else can comprehend. And, this is a great place to reflect, share, and and discover. It worked for me.

Every day is a new day. The best thing to do is to take each day on its own merit and commit yourself to doing your best. When it doesn’t work, try to figure out what and why then do it again tomorrow and try to move forward each day. Don’t get lost looking too far down the road.


Starting fresh is a gift we give ourselves. No one controls our access to that mindset but ourselves. Now I know it’s not just a simple thing to do. We have to trust the we will not let the past continue to burden us and also truly believe that we can succeed.

It can be tricky business as we must often work through the knowledge that we’ve tried before and failed. I think a clean slate mindset can enable us to head out on a new adventure and become our own hero. I’ve learned that to succeed with our intentions often requires liberal amounts of personal forgiveness. It doesn’t matter how many times we fail as long as we’re still willing to make another attempt at any worthwhile goal.

As someone who’s had good access to the medicine and d-supplies I need, I can only imagine the added stress of economic concerns competing with what you need to be healthy. Remember, the best thing you can do for your family is to take care of your health. Just ask your family, they’ll tell you that your health comes first!

As people with diabetes who receive constant feedback in terms of fingerstick numbers and the A1c from the doctor, I think the best metaphor I’ve heard about this feedback is to think of the data as a signpost. It simply suggests the direction you need to travel. It’s neither good nor bad!

Good luck with your fresh start! Participating in a forum like this can add peer support to all your efforts. We understand – we get it!


I went nearly 15 years without seeing a doctor and 20 before I listened to one. No, you are not alone. I promise.


You are not alone! I’m sorry it’s been so tough for you and I think it’s just wrong that insulin is so expensive in the US.

I just looked on a Canadian site that ships to the US and one box of 5 pen cartridges of Humalog is $89.99 US. Is that cheaper? Apparently the US doesn’t "allow’ prescription meds to be shipped from other countries, but typically won’t stop small personal use shipments from coming in. As far as Canada is concerned they are more than happy to ship insulin to the US, it’s legal from our perspective. At least this is what I’ve read… not 100% sure everything you can read on the internet is true…hahaha :slight_smile:

As for getting back on track with your D, my daughter and I saw a quote once that said that blood glucose numbers are just information, not judgement, and we both like that. And as someone here just reminded me, managing diabetes is a marathon, not a sprint. We have a goal of good A1C’s but sometimes life takes you on a detour, but you can always find your way back.

I wish you the best in your journey and glad you could join us.


Thank you guys for responding. It can feel very isolating when your the only one around dealing with this. I guess I really am not alone in this huh :grinning:

Feeling a bit better today and taking full amounts of insulin thanks to samples from my doctor. next step is getting help with my depression.

Thanks again and I can’t wait to get to know you all better and learn more as well!


I - and mostly everyone who is diabetic - have been there, and go back there often. It is not easy, ever. But you do have so many people here and all over the web who are willing and able to be there for you with compassion, understanding, and information.

Reflect, share, vent, and discover all you need and want. We are listening, we understand, we are here for you.

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Walmart insulin is over the counter and $30 - short term and long term. Not the best insulins, but better than none at all. No point in allowing harm to come to you. Your kids need you healthy and happy. That is the most important thing to them, trust me. Keep on, keeping on, Diabetic soldier. Sounds like a terrible time in the trenches. You’ve got this. I admire your self sacrifice, but listen to Patton and pretend he’s talking about high blood sugar instead of nazis, LOL. Be the best diabetic that you can be. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDAWaYu-YCo

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Not much to add to what has already been said, except for…

Welcome to TUD @phillips4adventure!

As you can see, it’s a responsive, caring and helpful community. Hope you stick around!


Your post really resonated with me. I can totally relate to what you’re saying here. Please know you’re not alone! Also, thank you for your honesty.

Hey that is what we are here for. I know what you are talking about. It happened to us. It got so bad I had to declare bankruptcy. It gave us a chance to start over. I’m not say go and do it but it is something think about. You have to take care of yourself . Your sugars are to high. try to get them down or you will have other problems that may cost you more. Believe me

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Hello, I’ve been there more than once and have always managed to come back. Do take of yourself. I so wish you didn’t have this added complication to the complication of just dealing with diabetes on a daily basis. Your doctor is right. Forget about what your old highs and concentrate on the new normals.

And take each day at a time…each day shared with this community if necessary. There’ll always be someone here who truly understands.

You are definitely not alone in your actions or feelings. I am in the very same predicament. I feel that guilt and anger over the money it cost to keep me healthy. My family goes without quite a bit Bc of my medical cost. We have very little food, so I have started to apply for food help. I am writing an attached document explaining that proper nutrition is part of treating my ailments along with my medical cost and a breakdown of where/how money is spent. (on the mortgage and home bills etc) I’m told this may help us get financial help with food. (I’m in Texas)
Have you looked into assistance with other bills to free up money for meds/supplies?

Also, some insulin companies have programs to help ease the financial burden. I take Tresiba (long acting) and my doctor switched me from humalog to novolog to save me money. He explained that Novodisk makes tresiba and novolog and Bc I’m buying both insulins from the same company, there is a financial incentive. Perhaps this applies to you? Ask your doctor…

I was on an insulin pump and dexcom but got off both, choosing injection therapy and more frequent blood sugar checks to decrease my medical spending.

I’ve been diabetic 40 years and have had MS for the last 10 years. I am currently looking for help by contacting different diabetes associations (and MS groups) for any assistance I can find. If I find anything I will post it to you.

Please don’t ration. It’s extreamly expensive, I know. But the treatment for complications from diabetes is more expensive and more invasive/painful. Let’s find you some help.

I would really like to form or join a group to approach insurances and legislators about the importance of keeping diabetes treatment cost down. It behoves them to give us affordable access to insulin/other meds and supplies so that we are practicing preventative medicine. It’s so much less expensive for them to do this, rather than treat us for the complications.

I’m new to this website. I’m not sure how I could get back in touch with you if I find some help. I’ve just started researching. You can contact me on my email: elenaruiz50@gmail.com

Praying for you and all who are having a difficult time. It will get better- but only if we take the proper amount of insulin, and other measures to care for ourselves. :heart:

We are here for you whenever you need us. I am happy that you are taking the full amount of insulin again. As others have said, taking care of your health so you can take care of your children is the first step in the right direction. I also pray that as your blood sugars return to normal, you will begin to feel better both physically AND emotionally. When I run high, I tend to feel down. When I am within normal range, my whole physical and mental health greatly improves. I sincerely hope that the same thing happens to you. God bless.

I don’t know.where in the world.you are located but if you can get.to Vancouver bc in Canada i.will give you some money f my insulin for free

I take Lantos and novo rapid

I’ve been exactly where you were and if it wasn’t for free samples from a diabetic clinic I would.habe ended up.in the hospital

I meant I will give you some of mine for free

I live in Traverse City, MI the pinky area of the mitten. If I could afford to get to Vancouver I would totally take you up on your generous offer…thank you!

its good to know that there are people willing to help :grinning:

Being told “you are not alone” doesn’t make you feel any less alone. I’ve been told this as well, and have experienced the same kind of depression, over both medical bills, and all the bull that goes along with diabetes. I tell myself that it’s not something I should get down about, because I live in a place where this treatment is available to me. I shouldn’t get down about it because some people have no money at all and can’t afford to buy their insulin. I saw a man on the side of the road once with a sign that said “Please help, homeless, diabetic.” I gave him a vial of my insulin (he had his own needles) but that moment has stuck with me forever. All the guy asked for was insulin. But even that doesn’t make me feel better often. its still depressing, still a lot (A LOT) to ask a person to deal with. It affects every single part of your life. I’m one of those people that will try their best to suck it up whenever I get down about it, but the truth is that sometimes I just have to let myself be down about it. Because of complications stemming from failing to take care of myself when I was younger (for most of my diabetic life, in fact,) I started to have panic attacks where I would literally hide in my closet. I started recording video of myself just talking about everything I was feeling, what I wish I had done, what I don’t want to happen, what I think will happen, just everything. It just feels good to get it all out. Ultimately I went on a low dose of something to stop the panic attacks, but here’s my advice on this in a nutshell. Diabetes is expensive. The average person cannot afford the tools or the medications to insure that they are getting the best care possible, and in the ways that are most convenient (yay another thing to stress about.) You can make what is available to you work for you, but make sure you make it work. If you are trying and trying with something and it isn’t working, don’t stick with it just because of money. This is your health and your life, and you want to be around and healthy enough to make sure that your failing health is not another thing to worry about. In the long run, you WILL spend more money taking care of all the ailments and problems that come with poor care.

I think diabetes has made me feel more alone than anything else, and I am the epitome of an introvert. No matter how many people claim they know the mechanics of diabetes and the complications (whether money or physical) it comes with, unless you have lived it, no one can relate. I think the only person who actually understands in my life is my mother. Thank god for her, because I’m sure I would have been dead years ago without her help.

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Every word you said I totally get. I deal with this disease and I understand my family does too but it’s different. My husband tries to understand but he just gets mad when I end up in the hospital. It’s such an emotional disease as much as a medical one. My mom has been my saving grace through all of this. She doesn’t claim to understand it all but she’s there for me no matter and is always there for an answer or to tell me to go into ER lol