I hope that I am not alone in this thought, but I find that in between dr appointments I seem to get a sense of fear that just runs thru my entire body. I am presently 17 weeks pregnant (tomorrow) and things have been going along well so far. I feel pretty good, thankfully that bronchitus I experienced beginning of January finally went away. Yet I find that I am often scared. Scared that there's something wrong. Scared that my one high blood sugar is just wrecking havoc on my baby. Scared that something should be happening that isn't, though I know that one is 100% becuase this is all new to me.
Does anyone else feel this way? Am I nuts?
I am soothed after seeing the dr and hearing that heart beat and being reminded that everythings is coming along just as it should. This feeling of ease (if you can even really call it that) lasts a few days maybe even a week then out of nowhere....fear sets in again.
Does this get better as you get further along? Is my fear rational and based on my previous experience (late miscarriage May 2011)?
I love to read about all the diabetic ladies on here who are further along or have had their babies and are all doing well. It gives me hope that I too will join them in their mommy-hood in July 2012. Thank you for sharing your stories ladies and supporting eachother during this happy but new experience.
I was totally scared, and somewhat obsessively looking up miscarriage rates, etc. I found that I felt a HELL of a lot better once I was able to feel her move. (I'm 25 weeks now.)
I felt some maybe-this-is-movement?? scritchy-scratchy things starting ~18weeks, and unmistakable movement (could be felt from the outside) starting at ~20-21 weeks, though it's different for everyone. And it was a bit stop and start at first -- like I'd only feel her in the evening, for example. But that is apparently totally normal -- they still have a lot of room to move around in there.
You are sooo NOT nuts! I was terrified of losing my baby, especially before I could feel him moving (around 21 weeks I think). I so looked forward to any doctor appointment, just so that I could hear his heartbeat or see him on ultrasound. I think that your fear is completely normal. Having just gone through my pregnancy, I believe that many doctors (and internet articles and folks with their own horror stories) want you to be aware of the worst case scenario. I had doctors warn me of every possible horrible outcome, even though my diabetes was in excellent control and every ultrasound and exam showed a perfectly normal, healthy baby. If everything is indicating that you have a healthy baby, then Hallelujah! At this moment you have a healthy baby! Don't let the fear take over until there is some indication that you have something to fear. The REALITY is that type 1 women have healthy, perfect little babies every single day. That outcome is FAR more likely than anything else.
Amanda, I had a fear of being pregnant long before I ever got pregnant. The fear is because of diabetes.
Every time I had a high (or even slightly high) blood sugar, I felt scared, guilty, powerless...
I can't say that the fear ever went away, but it became more manageable and I reminded myself that I was doing everything in my power to help our little one.
I was not perfect and my blood sugars were not perfect, but my 7 month old son is!! :-) Wishing you all the best!!
Hi Amanda. I am now 11 weeks along and am going through the same thing. This is my first too. I was doing great since my last ob apt last week where i got to hear that beautiful little heartbeat. And according to my Dexcom my sugars have improved dramatically since i found out i was preg. But this morning i woke up to read a study about the risks of diabetes and pregnancy. Though I am fully aware of these risks, it still stings to be reminded of what could (but probably won't) go wrong. It made me burst into helpless tears. And its tough, because my other mom-to-be friends don't know this level of fear. I know its very important to stay positive and to limit your stress while pregnancy, so I'm trying, and I hope you do too, to focus on how well you are doing. When you have a high, don't dwell on it. Just work on bringing it down. Its all you can do. I hope, like me, you are encouraged by all of the success stories posted on here. Good luck!
I hear you!
I felt this way the entire pregnancy! I had days when I was very optimistic and thought things were going the right way, and days when all the negative thoughts were on me and i couldn't get out of that phase. I had all the bad scenes in my mind. I am sure these kind of worries are bad for the bs as well, so please stop having them. You are doing the best you can, ocassional highs or lows won't "damage" your baby and everything will be fine. You will see.:)
Thank you ladies all so much for your openness and support. I appreciate hearing that I am not alone in my fears and concerns. I have opted to not read much and limit my online searches in an effort to avoid unnecessary freaking out.
Today I had an appt with the OB and got to hear that lovely lovely heartbeat and was also told that my second trimester blood work came back awesome! Now, I am very much looking forward to my detailed ultrasound & fetal echocardiogram (Feb. 16). I just love to see baby on that ultrasound screen.
