Is this a good sign? I never know exactly where to post here. I’m still feeling my way around, and reading as much as I can. When I first posted, the day after diagnosis the best I could match up my feelings to, was introduction. It’s been almost 2 months, and it feels like years! I feel firmly in Type 2 territory. Not sure if that means this post belongs in type 2, but I’m gonna go for it. So many changes already. I love to read here. To learn here. I’m not good at responding to messages yet, but I sure read them and it feels like a hug. Maybe someday I’ll be less shy and reply better. Some things I’m going through are,
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Relating to a post on here filling in the blank about “You know you have diabetes when”,and read that someone bought a bigger purse to accommodate all of the paraphernalia that goes with diabetes. CHECK! I did just that. I felt like I belonged when I laughed about this.
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Own more than one, more than two, more than 3, yes 4 meters in the 2 short months since diagnosis. I start to feel excited and special when I get a new one. Who knew diabetes could satisfy a shopping urge! (see above for need to accommodate all of these)
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I obsess about the accuracy of meters. I read on it, I argue with it, I compare one to the other, full well knowing it doesn’t work that way. Somehow I will it to work that way anyhow! Silly me.
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Thank goodness I love cheese. It makes the world ok. I love non-carb things. I was not a sweets girl. I ate them, but they didn’t float my boat like cheese. Sometimes I dream of getting a goat, and making cheese!
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I am finding myself strangely relieved at the eating changes. I no longer have to decide if I have the willpower to eat properly. The decision is made for me. I just do. I literally can not eat badly. That in and of itself is a relief. Is it odd I view it this way? and not as a doomsday restriction?
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I find lots I can eat. I find awesome recipes. I am not hungry. I slowly test the occasional tiny serving of some carbs and see how it reacts with me. I’ve found some I can tolerate without spikes, long OR short. I see these as blessings!
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I do believe I will be 1,000 times healthier in the end. In fact, having diabetes might just PROLONG my life, in other ways. Is there some honeymoon phase in that denial/anger/grief/acceptance chart? Some skipping through the daisys, oblivious to the deep, dark monster that diabetes can feel like?
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I hated, hated, hated the eye test my MD’s office performed. I’m off to a specialist due to inconclusive results. I couldn’t work all day after. Have learned to schedule such things at the end of a work day, so evening/night can be rest and recoup time. Lessons, lessons.
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Wonder why my numbers are always, always lower after eating summer squash. Who knows!!!
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Absolutely don’t mind everyone else eating everything else.
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Advice to be cautious about who I told, and when I was ready to share this news, invaluable. I was stronger about it when some found out, thankfully. Some people are incredibly dense, even if they don’t mean to be.
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Just because your numbers drop 300 points, doesn’t mean you’re gonna feel great. Takes your body a while to adjust to the new numbers, which can feel like lows, as you work your way down. Funny to say to someone, I feel like I’m low, and it’s at 140. But it happened. It’s not that way anymore. 90’s feel a little wobbly for now, but totally manageable. I assume this will resolve itself too.
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I do NOT want the doctor to be examining my feet! It’s creeping me out. I have an appointment tomorrow for a 3 week check up since last visit and it’s tootsie checking time. ACK!
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I am calmer, more centered, less confused feeling, forgetting less at home/work, and pretty unflappable, than I was hoovering in the 300-400+ range. I guess I do NOT have early on set Alzheimer’s after all! More good news.
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I am starting to feel more energetic. Not wanting a nap EVERY day after work. I feel like I’m waking up from a fog I didn’t even know I was in.
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Weightloss, while truly just a happy side effect at this point, from eating the way I feel I should be right now, is never a bad thing. A new wardrobe could be in the future. The very distant future. More shopping urges fulfilled thanks to diabetes!
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My entire family is eating better. More good news.
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I understand family members better who also have diabetes. It’s a bond of sorts. Just like the amazing people here. How would I ever have met you all without this shared struggle. I’m glad to know you all.
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I have also learned that in any segment of society, some differences will always occur. The Diabetes world is no different. There seem to be disagreements, different personality types, different ways of coping and viewing this journey. It’s ok to not subscribe to all opinions and ideas. Some people will always be more/or less understanding. More or less judgemental, and more or less willing to try to understand. We’re all just people!
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I never expected to laugh as much as I have on this site. Laughter will be my saving grace. Thank you all for your stories. Your humor. I think it’s brilliant.
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Wonders why whenever I try to discreetly test in my office, someone nearly ALWAYS seems to pop in. I’m not sharing it with everyone yet. I can get my stuff out,smile to myself,wait 5 min, nothing. Start to test, and voila! Someone always pops in. The guilty look probably gives it all way on my face, while I try to not so successfully hide all the paraphernalia under my girly bits.
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Thinks the worst thing I ended up hearing was my boss telling me to “not kick the bucket over the weekend”,after finding out I had diabetes on that Friday. I would report her to the H.R department, if the H.R department didn’t consist of her and I. (giggling)
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Newly appreciative of health insurance, after rarely visiting the doctor in the last 20 years.
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Am grateful for some products created specifically for people like me. Low carb yogurt, low carb pitas of whole grain and flax seed, RyKrisp crackers (a rare treat) and my mothers homemade soup, frozen in little jars, every day for lunch. I love you mom!
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New appreciation for my immediate family. Who shove yogurt, or nuts, into their coat pockets if we’re going out too close to dinner for errands, just in case. Who bring me celery slightly coated in peanut butter if dinner is late along with my meds. The same children who assured me my crustless pizza was better than their own from the local pizzeria. The family who checks on my readings, orders me more strips when I want to test more, makes sure my prescriptions are filled ahead of time, and my 11 year old son, who loves to pack my lunch box with all good options, AND unpack it when I return home. Diabetes became another way for my family to show love and care for another.
Am I abnormal for feeling all of this? Someone told me here, that I’d feel every emotion on the spectrum at some point. I am not scared anymore. I am not depressed now. I am relieved, grateful, healthier. Is diabetes my foe? or friend.
Thank you all. You and the topics here have held my hand through this all, and will continue to do so. It has meant the world to me, and in turn to my family and friends. I can honestly say I don’t think I’d have gotten this far, this ok, without you all. I would be afraid, and in a dark place.
You are all spectacular.
. Hang in here …