It's Been A While

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1

I’ve haven’t spent much time on tudiabetes in recent months. After joining, I was so excited about connecting with people and learning some tips and tricks about diabetes management.

And I did learn a lot. I still carry smarties around with me instead of glucose tablets. But, unfortunately, I think a lot of the lessons didn’t stick with me.

I’m a college freshman now, and diabetes has taken a backburner in my life for the past month that I’ve been here. I still check my sugar before eating 9 out of 10 meals (but not all of them) and I have a fridge full of insulin and apple juice.

But at least once a day (on good days), my blood sugar sky rockets up to 300+. It’s gotten to the point where I just don’t care anymore. I have a headache, I’m cranky and soooo thirsy, but I just shrug my shoulders and take another bolus out of my insulin pump.

This is not good.

So I decided that I would take things one day at a time, and see how many days I could go without having a single high blood sugar (which I defined as over 250. I’ve got to start somewhere). So, since I threw down the gauntlet, I have gone a total of zero days without highs.

Wow.

I guess I need to be more proactive. I should probably see a doctor too, but I didn’t like my last endocrinology, he almost made me cry. And now that I’m living 6 hours away from home, without a car or any idea where the endocrinologists are in this area (I’m not totally ignorant though, I do know where I can find the hospital & urgent care, plus I’ve talked to the school nurse)

Anyway, I’m back on tudiabetes, and I really hope that I’ll get more out of the experience this time then I did when I originally joined. I can just feel my insides crying just a little bit when my blood sugar gets so high (it’s 301 right now), and I don’t want to do that to my body. I want to live to be a ripe old grandmother, even great-grandmother, and with the path I’m going down now, I don’t know if that can happen. But I’m determined to take better care of myself, and that’s why I’m here.

2

Kelsie, we are really glad that you are here with us. It’s really stressful to be in college and far from home, and having diabetes makes it especially hard. I had a lousy endo too that made me cry, and I got a lot of encouragement here to change to another, and I am soooo glad I did. Try to take one step at a time to figure out why you are having the highs. Maybe start with keeping a detailed diary of what you are eating and insulin you are taking. Don’t beat yourself up! Come here often, we are here to help each other without blame or shame.

3

Kelsie, you have taken the first step by admitting you were “off the wagon” and putting it in writting that you want to get back on. You have it exactly right - one day at a time. Log your food and activities. I know it is hard with all the work but try to get some exercise. Just like you find people to study with find someone that will exercise with you and take advantage of the school’s gym. Take advantage of the healthy options during mealtimes 0 salads and veggies. Talk to the nurse at school as much as you need to, that is what she is there for. See if she can put you in touch with any other diabetics at school and you all can start a support group. See if there is a grocery store in walking distance and stock up on healthy snacks. Just make sure you do not go anywhere by yourself! My daughter, though not a diabetic) is in the same boat - a freshman, 3 1/2 hrs from home and no car. And remember to check in here for all the encouragement you need!

4

Thanks guys! The environment here is so supportive & everyone is really helpful & encouraging (Dori & Marie, you are prime examples of that), so I know this is a good move on my part.
And I’m happy to say that my highest blood sugar today was 166 when I woke up this morning, and then though I did run a little low from wandering around campus, I didn’t overcorrect the low. So, I feel like I’m heading down a good path right now. :slight_smile: Tomorrow, hopefully, I’ll check out the fitness center.

5

You sound a lot like me a few years ago. (I responded to your other blog, too.)

The best advice I ever received - or reminded myself - was to add steps back in slowly. At some point, we were told how to take better care of ourselves. We have to add those steps back in in our own time. College is hard - sooo stressful - and you’re very much on your own. I’ve been there. I’m 29 now and I was a college freshman exactly ten years ago. I was still on shots then (started the pump the next year). I stayed out of control until about two years after graduation though, with A1c’s off the charts, everything back burnered because my sugars were always in the 300s, etc. Here’s the good news - I’m healthy today without complications (so far) and expecting my first baby.

Okay, so those baby steps. Pick one and try it.

  1. Keep one meter/strips/lancet in your purse or bookbag that stays in there and another on your nightstand. That way there’s always one out and conspicuous when you’re in your dorm and there’s always one on you when you’re out. No excuses. I used to use the excuse that I’d left the meter at home and would be out all day. This practice helped me stop.
  2. Agree to start testing every morning when you wake up and every night before you go to sleep. Slip-ups are allowed. (But the meter on your nightstand will help.) You can choose to bolus to correct these numbers - or you can just start by actually taking the time to test. Add the bolusing in later.
  3. Start getting more serious about your carb counting. Assume you’ve been doing it wrong. (God knows I was.) Pick some of your favorite meals at your favorite places and look them up on calorieking.com or dotti’s weight loss zone. See if you’ve been underestimating your carbs when you eat out. Odds are, you have.
  4. This idea is my FAVORITE - totally helped me. No blood sugar number? No bolus! Don’t press that up arrow (or whatever) unless you know the blood sugar. I banned myself from my audio bolus and FORCED myself to use the wizard on my pump every time. No number, no insulin. That solved the testing before meals problem. I knew I needed the insulin and was fine taking it, but if I couldn’t let myself touch that button, I needed to be able to access it through the bolus wizard and that means I needed an honest BG value.
  5. Allow yourself to skip some of the more tedious stuff. Don’t log. Don’t diet. Don’t change your lancet. Don’t whatever. Give yourself wiggle room (you can always tackle these things later). Right now, focus on a few important things you can change today. And if today doesn’t go well, start again tomorrow. It’s okay to fail at diabetes. We all suck at it to some degree. It’s not okay to give up.