Tonight I went to my first JDRF team captain meeting for the Des Moines, IA JDRF walk coming up in May. I have been diabetic for almost 7 years now coming up in May, the same month as the JDRF walk this year. I know some of you may have ever heard of Des Moines, IA and when you hear Iowa you wonder "what do they grow there again? Potatoes?" however it has been my home for about 25 years. While I dream of someday moving to a fabulous big city something like Chicago or Denver I know that my career in terms of having enough experience to move is still young. I will say the same thing about being a type 1 diabetic. It has only been just short of 7 years, I am still a child when it comes to living with and dealing with type 1 diabetes. While yes every diabetic has a "story" I have not lived enough to have a story and I know everyone at JDRF would be telling me it doesn't matter what age (in real live or diabetes years) you are, YOU HAVE A STORY. However, is my story interesting? does anyone care? most important do I want to share it?
While 7 years is a significant amount of time I still have a hard time saying "I'm diabetic" and believing it. I still feel like its some sort of weird dream or twilight zone episode I'm forever stuck in. So I seek the advice of the wise souls here on tudiabetes Does that feeling ever go away? Will I ever feel "normal with diabetes" or will I always feel like I did something wrong to develop this? How long does it take to truly accept what you have and how it affects you? I know I have diabetes and I am by no means ignoring anything I check BG, I regulate using an insulin pump and for being as "young a diabetic" as I am I hear doctors when they tell me a 7.3% A1C is good for someone like me but still...
So here is my hope, by surrounding myself with others who have been involved with T1D and others who have lived with it and tell their story as often as possible I hope I can make that twilight zone feeling go away. With that hope comes acceptance, understanding and my ability to be encouraged again. I am extremely grateful of my co-worker who asked me to go to the meeting tonight and this year participate in the JDRF walk. I should have started years ago however I was scared and hoping that I would eventually "wake up" well ya know what? I won't wake up, this is it. All I can do is now do more to make sure that either there is eventually a cure or at least prevent this disease even a little bit from spreading to future generations.