Rough Night!

Right now my head feels like it's on fire! I just want to break down and cry. I'm having a little bit of a high. I feel sick to my stomach like I have to throw up and I just want to scream! I'm sick of everyone saying that I'm in a crappy mood! YES I'm in a crappy mood, but they wouldn't understand. No one in this house understands! My head hurts so bad. I can't even think right to type this blog but I really want to vent. This is some crap. Anytime I have a high "they" blame it on something I ate. First off all EVERYTHING you eat raises your blood sugar! So back off! Just leave me alone! I just didn't cover it with the right amount of insulin. If "they" want me to calculate so perfectly then STOP ordering take out! I can calculate right if I don't know the right about of carbs!! Stop telling me what I can and can't eat and telling everyone I have diabetes. Now I'm like the spokes person for diabetes with everyone we know. I don't wanna talk to them about it cuz they won't understand! All they going to tell me is that know someone who has it like their grandma or something. I am 21 freakin years old! I'm not your grandma and I'm sure you grandma would tell you that you have no clue to what you're talkin about. I just want to be normal! People laugh when I say normal. But if you can put anything in your mouth and not think twice about it then you're NORMAL!!!! I don't care if dairy products make your stomach hurt. Almost EVERYTHING makes my head feels like it's about to blow up or I'm going to throw up or feel like crap. If you see me check my blood sugar...don't ask me what it was. If I want to tell you I will tell you! Stop say ooohhh I'm sorry once you find out I have diabetes. Is it your fault? Did you give it to me? If you did let me know because I will personally kick your butt for passing it to me. AND diabetes is not cooties you can't get it if I touch you so stop looking at me CRAZY before I go CRAZY on you! If I make a noise stop asking me if I'm ok every single second of the day! I still breathe normally! People just get on my nerves. I just want to be treated like everyone else. I'm not special I'm not handicap. Most likely I can do everything you can do besides go long without eating.

Stop asking me dumb questions about when i was little. NO I didn't eat a lot of candy. NO I didn't drink alot sugary drinks. YES I ate vegetables. YES you can get Type 1 diabetes when you're 19! STOP being closed minded! I didn't ask for this so therefore I didn't ask for permission to be treated differently. I'm the same person!

Sorry to hear your having such a rough time, no I didn’t do this to you, but I do know how you feel. :stuck_out_tongue: Yes, it’s a pretty rough road at times and starting out is really tough. There is a huge learning curve to D and each person’s body is different to some extent. Take out is murder on bs, bc like you said it’s really hard to calculate. I think one of the reasons is that food has things like corn starch and “hidden” ingredients that you might not even consider. Also most take out is carbs that hit your system quickly. For instance, white minute rice compared to brown will hit quickly because it’s more processed than the brown rice. French fries are very high in carbs. I will add extra insulin for safety sake and then monitor closely for the next two hours, so that if you’ve given yourself too much, you’ll catch yourself before you go low. A good workout with cardio can also help to drop your bs, if your not too sick to be able to move. When you have a high, no one can understand unless they’ve had it happen to them. I’ve tried to explain how I was feeling as well, like when you are so thirsty and keep drinking water and it’s like you have paper towel stuffed in your mouth (because it just seems to disappear) and gives you no satisfaction. Headaches are common as well and yes, it’s brutal sometimes. Once you start to throw up though you are on dangerous ground. Your body is trying to “throw up the sugar” and you become dehydrated very quickly. Have you noticed that once you start to throw up, you can’t stop? Also your blood sugars either sit or start to climb even higher? There are really two possible things going on,first you may not have given enough insulin to cover the carb intake and second it could be a problem with your pump. I usually will give myself a shot by injection to see if it’s a pump issue. If my bs starts to drop, it’s the pump and change your site. If you don’t start to drop, you’ve not taken enough insulin. For me, when I notice I am getting high (I’m not necessarily recommending it for you but I’ll tell you what works for me) I put my basal up to like 130% and I drink a ton of water and monitor every hour. I use Humalog and it’s a fast acting insulin, so even within a half hour I’ll start to see results. It’s works if you can catch it before things get serious. Water is important bc your body needs that fluid to help deliver the insulin to where it needs to go and if your dehydrated, it’s too “dry” to work properly. Also, once I hit that point of throwing up I head to a hospital and they will give you an iv to help rehydrate you and they usually add potassium to help get your electrolyghtes back on track and very likely you are DKA. It’s important to know, once it hits that level it’s out of your hands and you need help. You are on a tough journey but with an A1c at where yours is, you’re normal and just learning. I’ve been on the pump for 4 years now and I’m still learning too. Things are a lot better, but I am still learning. Hope this helps and your feeling better soon.

You should check out the “purley frusterated” blog from earlier in the day. You might see some similarities. L

I feel your pain and frustrations!!! I posted a blog yesterday that was very much like your own. I just needed to vent. I refer to T1D as a pain in the butt because it really is. I hope that things all work out for you!!! Don’t let others lack of understanding about this disease get you down.

Hugs and kisses sister.
Stay strong everything takes time.xxxxxxxx

How are you feeling today?

Thanks everyone for your concern. I’m actually doing alot better. That high blood sugar turned into a hypo. Before I moved I had pretty much a handle on everything, but I think with the stress and my sleep schedule thrown off it making everything go hay wire. Since I’m not working my body doesn’t want to go to sleep when I want it to. lol So some days I"m up til 5-8 in the morning and then I sleep til like 1 in the afternoon. Now us diabetics no that’s not good at all. lol That means I dont skipped so many meals and then when I wake up I"m not hungry so sometimes I don’t eat until 5 or 6 in the afternoon. So I think once I get back into a routine that I will be fine. Since I’m not eating like I’m suppose to it seems like I"m dropping weight like it’s nothing. I promise I lost like 4 pounds in less than a week. lol

Glad you’re doing better, Some days are just bad days eh! Stress really affects my bs and it ususally makes them go high. Although it’s sort of a “false” high in that there is nothing supporting it, so easily it can drop quickly as well. Just try to test more often when you notice that you’re more stressed than normal. Getting yourself back on a somewhat normal sleeping pattern will help as well. As soon as you stop sleeping well everything is amplified I find. It all goes back to the old sleep well and eat and be well. :0)

I liked your music video