Why do tu members leave the tu community?

Thanks Badmoont2. My dog is a blessing to have plus added bonus is that having a dog around really helps reduce symptoms of depression for the most part. Other benefits as well.

I was sure she’d chosen to leave though, in that big nasty thread, or one on a similar subject?

As a person who reads three sites, I always think of this one as the warmest towards a variety of people/types. Maybe I am half blind! I have seen some of the strong discussion on T1 vs T2 and I hope no one was booted due to their strong views.
I don’t feel that I “belong” to any of the three sites I frequent but at least one other is much more judgmental than this one. I still go there but know that some of my comments will get ridiculed.
But, regarding people leaving, it may not be the reason I have for just lurking or leaving occasionally. I find that sometimes I think the comments are the same old same old. And, trust me, I have been in the place of those folks asking these same questions, but basically my decisions are made. That is, 'what pump should I get," I have ‘this or that problem with my insertions or pump.’ So on those days I just flip in and flip out. Sometimes I respond to those newbies but usually someone else has already given a good answer. I try to respond only if I can add at least one thing not said before.

Sometimes I wish there were more in depth discussions of living with diabetes. Specific to T1, T2, and both. Example, for those of us who just aren’t compulsive about our habits and maintenance–what have others done to break through the enui (sp?) and change behaviors for the better. What if you really don’t enjoy exercise, what do you do? Hate doing BGs and get tired of it? How really learn how to count carbs and do it?

Oh, just thought of one more thing. On all the sites, I get turned off by the “preachers” of low carb diets. Sheeesh!! Even if you are absolutely certain that it is ‘THE ONLY WAY’ please don’t insist that a newbie who is just asking a simple diet question start on low carb immediately. OK, now I am infuriating half the regulars here. Oh well, there are still new sites, right?
It is still a good site, even if I am booted! Hey, that might be fun. “I was booted by a diabetes discussion forum! After 3 years of psychotherapy, I started my own forum and now boot at least one person per month. It made a world of difference for me!”

I’m the same way about the low-carb “gang”/ sub-club. It seems almost impossible to discuss food, a very important part of most of our equations, without it being swamped w/ lowcarbophiles. Although I trimmed some carbs out, mostly 3 servings of nuts.

It’s kind of hard to ask someone when they are no longer a member and can’t receive messages. But that brings up a good point…when you click on someones profile and it directs you to a page that says, “This person is no longer a member”,…maybe it should say “this person has been banned from this site” OR “This person has left the community”. That way we know if they broke the rules and guidelines or not. It shouldn’t be something that is confidential to other members.

Also it seems kind of weird to kick someone when they can just sign up again with a different name. There is no way to really stop that.

Hi Emmy -

I’m not suggesting you leave but you might visit the ADA site where they do have an active Type 2 Forum. Variety can be the spice of life.

Maurie

I hop in and out. Sometimes I am the mood to be with friends online and other times I want to be with friends in the real world. Then there are sometimes I feel that I am becoming addicted to a certain site and I will quit posting altogether. Because I do not want to lose myself in the computer. Then of course there is death, illness, and financial reasons for not being here.

Thanks, acidrock!! Yep, food is one of the three most critical issues–and very difficult to manage and also hard to discuss. On everything else, the message is “do what works for you.” But food is a horse of a different color!

Mikey,

As an admin, I’ll try to address what you raised. True, when people are no longer active the community doesn’t know if was voluntary or not. It should be confidential because it’s really serves no purpose for other members to know the reason why. Posting “banned” on a page would be disrespectful & raise speculation as to the why. Members are suspended for various reasons & it’s a decision admin struggles with after much deliberation.

Tu is carefully monitored. We’ve had suspended members try to join again under different names. Since we know members well who are suspended, they’re either denied membership or quickly suspended again if they fly in under on the radar.

All this is done to protect our community & maintain the values that are critical to us all.

Emmy,
We ran a survey a few weeks ago asking about the general consensus on whether a type-specific community would be preferable and an overwhelming majority preferring a mixed community. Obviously this wasn’t 100% of respondents and respondents cannot be said to characterize the entire community, but given more than 700 people replied to the survey and the % of people that stated to leave the community the way it is today in terms of having all people together, and based on our belief that we really have a lot to learn from each other, we have decided to leave the community as is in terms of this.

If you ever run into cases where you consider someone is being rude and acting against the values of TuDiabetes, regardless of what type of diabetes they have, please make sure to contact the Admin team using the feedback link at the bottom of every page.

Overall, I believe TuD has “matured” in a good way. Yes, some people who have been very active (for example, Jenny of BloodSugar 101) move on, for what reason I don’t know. I certainly have learned a lot, and hearing so many opinions has broadened my perspective, and I am really grateful for that. I also have gotten some much needed support when I needed it and reached out for it, when my motivation needed CPR. And although I agree with MrAcidRock and Nell, that the low carb camp can be a bit extreme at times, the low carb camp has also opened my eyes to at least modifying my eating somewhat, which has been beneficial. Bottom line, I am sure there are a multitude of reasons that people leave, and some come back, welcome back Mikey!

Unfortunately, there are a number of T1’s that DON’T love T2’s. By no means all, nor even a majority, really, only a few, but they’re there. And they can be vicious and nasty.

And then there are the T1’s that advocate for T2’s, because they know that NO ONE has an easy time with diabetes, and a 200 is just as bad as a 400, because both are too high and can cause damage.

There is nowhere near enough advocacy in the T2 community, because so many of them are older, not computer literate, not diabetes literate, and don’t have the experience, time or energy to get into advocacy. So it’s up to those who ARE able to advocate to do it for ALL diabetics, not just for T1.

I did ask her that question, and she said she was kicked off, for defending herself. I know no more than that about it.

I miss Josephine & also hope she’s well & enjoying life.

When people leave, there’s a field for them to leave a reason(s). Members rarely state why.

Acid, when I last talked to LizM., she insisted that she’d been banned for “expressing” herself. I don’t know the entire situation, and frankly, I don’t need to know. What I do know is this: TuD was created by Manny, and in that respect, he “owns” this group. He and his representatives have the right to make rules that impact the functioning of the group, even if others think that the rules are “unfair”. When I compare TuD to other groups I’ve been around, I certainly do not think that Manny’s rules are in any way unfair. I’ve been involved with other diabetes online groups for many years, and of the groups, TuD is one that tries its best to be even handed and fair to everyone involved in the group. Of course, there are going to be some who disagree, but that is their choice.

Spring,



Thank you for saying this. I was just about to suggest that it’s not good manners or fair to discuss people who are no longer members for whatever reason.

I totally agree Gerri. Josephine was a Sweetheart. I know that the recession was Bad but…I don’t know, if that was the reason. I hope that she is Well also. :slight_smile:

Thanks, Angela! I had no idea how much the admin team did or how hard it was until I joined admin.