Now, before I start, I don’t hate them all the time. I mean, the past 19 years wouldn’t have happened without them (AND i got a wii for my birthday!
but there are times when I feel they really don’t care about my medical needs. My last A1c was in February (6.2, to my surprise) the one before that was 3 years ago they always talk about how they are going to save up all the money they can to get me a pump, but in the end spend it on other stuff. I guess i’m getting good results on MDI, but after 14 years of this, it’s kinda getting old.
but then 2 weeks ago THIS happened (warning graphic image ). It happened at work when i dropped a sheet of metal on my leg corner first. My dad said since I wasn’t going to bleed out, I shouldn’t get stitches because then the company would have to deal with OSHA. my dad is upper management and I guess he didn’t want to lose the company’s 191 day “accident free” streak.
This stupid cut bled for 4 days straight and to make it all worse, my parents made me buy my own butterfly strips and bandaids. Everyone who saw it said I should get stitches, I would have gone to the doctor myself, but I was -$180 in debt at the doctor’s office from when I needed physical therapy on my ankle (which my parents said they would pay for but never did) and I doubted they would take me in. I’m not even sure if my tetanus vaccine is up to date, but I’m assuming it’s not though. If this cut would have gotten infected I could be in serious trouble right about now!
Thankfully, it never got infected and it scabbed up just fine (although it took a week) In another week I think it should be fully healed. Its definitely going to leave a nice scar though. I’m not sure if that’s considered healing slow or not, but considering how much it bled, I don’t think my diabetes is causing it to heal slow.
It just makes me so mad. Why don’t my parents seem to care at all about my health?
Until you are 100% healed, you are still at risk for infection - all it takes is one tiny little opening in the skin for germs to get in. Believe me, I learned that lesson the hard way! I have been thru a nasty wound that started as dry cracked skin & I did go to the doctor on day one. Make sure if it even looks like it might be infected, you get to a doctor - it is not worth risking your leg for.
I can understand your being upset with your parents - you have every right to be. I have to wonder if your father would have told a different employee not to go get stitches? If it were me, I would have insisted on going. Since it was an accident at work, you would not be responsible for any part of the bill. The only problem with that is your employer can pick what doctor you go to.
Do you not have your own insurance? I am guessing you are an adult so you do have some autonomy. Certainly 4 days of bleeding is a lot but thankfully it has now scabbed over. The skin is thinner on your legs and ankle and your ankle is mobile making it harder to stop the bleeding. On average it takes me about a month to heal and I do scar badly. So it sounds as though you heal well anyway.
When you next go to the DSN how about asking about your tetanus status?
Perhaps you need to start thinking about working somewhere else and you do not have your father breathing down your neck and get your own insurance. It sounds as though your diabetes is pretty well under control so perhaps you do not need a pump. From what I have read they can be more trouble than they are worth!!
@latvianchick: no i don’t have my own insurance, i’m covered by my dad’s plan (at least till im 23)
and friday was my last day as a punch operator! now im going to get a week off to see what my college schedule i going to be like and maybe they will put me on press brake 2 days a week or something. if that happens ill be happy. there will be a LOT less risk of something like that happening (but more chance or losing a finger, so its give and take lol)
finding a job elsewhere is going to be hard though, liberty university is starting up again and about 10,000 college students about my age have moved into the city and i have a feeling quite a few will be looking for jobs also.
They say the world is round, and yet
I often think it square,
So many little hurts we get
From corners here and there.
But one great truth in life I’ve found,
While journeying to the West-
The only folks who really wound
Are those we love the best.
The man you thoroughly despise
Can rouse your wrath, 'tis true;
Annoyance in your heart will rise
At things mere strangers do;
But those are only passing ills;
This rule all lives will prove;
The rankling wound which aches and thrills
Is dealt by hands we love.
The choicest garb, the sweetest grace,
Are oft to strangers shown;
The careless mien, the frowning face,
Are given to our own.
We flatter those we scarcely know,
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best.
Love does not grow on every tree,
Nor true hearts yearly bloom.
Alas for those who only see
This cut across a tomb!
But, soon or late, the fact grows plain
To all through sorrow’s test:
The only folks who give us pain
Are those we love the best.
If you covered by insurance I’m surprised this is an issue. When I have damaged myself (which I seem to do on a regular basis), I just go get it sewed up. I just pay a $25 co-pay. Perhaps some of this is a matter of knowing how to use your insurance coverage effectively. Do you have a regular doctor? Can’t you go see him for just a co-pay?
Sorry, I was not au fete with the American way of things - I am from the UK where we have the National Health Service. While we complain a lot about it, it is a brilliant organisation as if you are unemployed all prescriptions are free and if you are diabetic (therefore on long term, life saving medication) you get all your prescriptions free whether working or not.
@bsc: they know how to use insurance and they use it all the time when something happens to them. but whenever something happens to me, oh well i just gotta deal with it. and no, i dont have a regular doctor. my parents dont want to go to UVA for appointments and they hated the pediatric endo here. i’m 19 so i should have more options available, but they don’t want to take me
My daughter is 19, just like you. She is covered by my insurance. I “expect” (and encourage) her to make an appointment at the doctor and visit the doctor on her own. I pay for her co-pay, but she basically does everything on her own. So I would encourage you to just go visit a doctor. It doesn’t have to be your endo and it doesn’t have to be even a regular family physician. You could probably just walk right up to an urgent care and be seen and only have to pay a co-pay. And if your parents won’t drive you, walk next door and ask the neighbor to drive you to the doctor.
ps. Here is a list of urgent care care places near you. You should check with each (by calling) to make sure they take your insurance.
Working for a family member is always tough… you may be asked to “bend the rules” for the sake of the company. And dealing with OSHA can be a real pain. I’m not saying your dad was right (he wasn’t), but I can see where he’s coming from.
Are there problems with money at home, or do your parents just not spend money wisely? I know that if Suze Orman were to hear this story, she would have DENIED the Wii, seeing as there were more pressing medical expenses at stake. But the pump would have been APPROVED, even if it meant going into more debt. People first, then money, then things. (My wife and I watch her on CNBC weekly). Maybe the Wii was a “consolation prize” worth a few hundred dollars, rather than an insulin pump (which - honestly, isn’t much fun to play with) costing a few thousand.
In any event, I suggest you try to find your own work - even if its a low-paying job that offers benefits. When you’re the son of the manager, it’s hard to earn the respect of your peers, and it’s not required to earn the respect of your boss. It’s an easy job to get, but a damn difficult job to keep.
But, back to your final question - why don’t your parents seem to care at all about your health? Ask them!! Maybe they’re just not good with these things. Being a parent of a kid with diabetes isn’t always easy, and there’s no way for them to truly relate to what you’re going through.
Parents learn to be parents from thier parents. If their parents weren’t the brightest, well it goes down the genetic lines. I have to say from personal experience, although I love my parents, they aren’t my favorite people in the world. Unless you have diabetes, you just dont understand what its like. You are an adult now. You are your own advocate for your health. You are old enough to make choices of your own. You are accountable for your own actions from now on.
I also used to work with and for my parents, if their wasnt enough cash flow, everyone got paid but me. If it was busy,staff got days off, but I had to work. Bottom line is, working for family means you get the short end of the stick any way you look at it. I highly recommend you find employment elsewhere. And if you still live with them… start making plans to move out on your own. Not saying to move right away, but at least start planning for it now.
There is an old saying. " If you leave your life planning to others, guess what they have planned for you? Not much."
I am glad you posted this blog, I truely relate to how you feel. And coming from the same situation, the best thing I ever did was to do it myself!
Take care and keep in touch!
xoxox
oh i see how it works then, since my parents are idiots I’M gonna be an idiot… great. and i currently have 2 weeks off from my job because i’m still getting adjusted to my college schedule.
