Acid- Yes I was actually really surprised to see members coming back from the past and stating how they have been busy etc., I actually expected some type of thank you (slightly :P) for contributing to making members come back from the past. Can anyone else do that? I wonder how those members that posted for the first time in months or years feel to come back only to have the thread locked?
I agree that the discussion was interesting, and if it had come to a vote I would have voted against closing it. It is clear that the reason for closing it had nothing to do with going in circles, but rather that it kept circling back to conjectures as to why someone was no longer posting - i.e. whether and why they had been blocked (Manny said as much).
Frankly I don’t understand the admin statement about the importance of “protecting the privacy” of those posting here. After all we are all anonymous, unless we go out of our way to NOT be anonymous. It would only be protecting privacy if someone had speculated about who one of the members was in real life - i.e. “I wonder if acidrock is really that guy Baxter Bumhousen from Birmingham?”. Since that wasn’t done, how is it violating privacy to speculate as to why someone else stopped posting?
That said, I agree with you Baxter - I mean acidrock - that this site seems to be run fairly and they seem open to lots of different points of view so it isn’t that big a deal for me. There are far, far worse diabetes sites - I used to post at islet.org (a truly horrible site) until I was blocked because I suggested that there may be some value in diabetes research other than islet transplants.
Manny-
You (and or admin) say the thread was “wandering” or “going in circles”. Compare that statement to a thread called “3 word story” which has little to do with diabetes and is all about “wandering”??!!
Also you talk about privacy of members (or ex-members?) but at the same time it is against the TU policy rules to delete certain replies about certain members names (screen names) in order to preserve the entire topic.
I’m not trying to start an argument. I am just trying to learn from mistakes. That was my intention of starting the original thread. I hope there is something to learn here. I was trying to figure out why people leave the community and what we can do to stop that from happening. Now I feel by getting the topic locked it will only make even more people want to leave Tu from the actual “locking”.
This topic has 8 likes and counting…
The original thread is here -> https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-tu-members-leave-the-tu
So many people would be happier if the original thread was unlocked. If it was unlocked this whole time it would probably already be in the history so far nobody would look or post. By locking it, now it has gotten more attention.
Being silly is certainly my homage to the Beastie Boys "avec leur beer swilling et glue sniffing " 
Judith I really haven’t followed this thread b/c of it’s sillyness. I agree with everything you just said though. Manny has tried more than once to explain this but apperantly some aren’t listening. I’m truely sorry that these ppl don’t listen.
The “3 word story” thread is for us to laugh at. Please!!! We need to laugh at things every once in awhile.
Doris just replied to your first point: indeed the 3 Word Story is MEANT to go around in circles. Hence it falls in the “Community Games” category of the forum. It’s by no means the focus of the community or something we’d promote on the home page with a banner.
I am not sure what you mean by this:
“it is against the TU policy rules to delete certain replies about certain members names (screen names) in order to preserve the entire topic.”
We try to maintain a certain environment and uphold certain values in order to keep the community strong. This is what we’ve been doing since the beginning and we’ve learned more and more over time. The guidelines and the values have evolved and gotten more and more specific as a result of the lessons we’ve learned.
Why do people leave (or become silent)?
There are lots of reasons, many of which have been stated. They get busy. They found what they were looking for or have learned what they came here to learn. They simply do not participate as much, but they are listening, etc.
Why do people get banned from the site?
Because they do not abide by the values of the community.
I think a very interesting discussion to have is: Why do people keep coming back? About 50% of the visitors to the site (this includes members and non-members) are returning visitors.
tactiques brechtiene…
In fact, I just started a topic to talk about this:
https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-you-come-back-to
Holy cow, why didn’t I think of that(?)! Thanks Manny!
Exit Phenomenon. That’s great, Judith. True. A self-fulfilling prophesy as well. “See, they (whoever the particular “they” is) really are against me.”
Thank you bsc, well said
Alan- Manny already opened a new thread that is MUCH, MUCH more positive. I’m thrilled. It makes SO much sense it’s silly… Check it out here -> https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-you-come-back-to
“Bar room brawl”? LOL, again, my purpose in starting the thread was to point out the absurdity of the alleged reason for closure of the original thread (that people were not staying on topic?) and also to point out, via the quoted Jam lyric, written @ the height of their romantic period (quoting Shelly on the back of “Sound Affects”) that it is eerie to have the sense of loss and longing amidst the generally positive sense of BElonging that comes from the thread. I did not in any way mean to suggest that the moderators are evil Saurons or anything like that. Or to be ganged up upon by the defensors fidei suggesting that (quel horreur) I am being silly? I am not sure what is being atttacked. i am certainly not attacking anyone though.
Totally agree!!!
Acid-
I myself couldnt be more happy you started this so my “locked” topic wouldn’t get buried in history without some raw debate. I tried to start a new thread after mine got locked and it was actually “deleted” so when I saw this moments later I was pleased. I never wanted to start an argument but instead try and learn from our mistakes about “why” members would want to leave. With that said…Manny has found a way to address the same concerns in a much more positive way here -> https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-you-come-back-to We as a community SHOULD focus on what will make us stick around, not what will make us leave. I almost regret starting that subject…Ok I do! And the way I look at it now, if you didn’t start this topic acid than Manny wouldn’t have started that one. So thanks for helping produce something positive! Oh and BTW acid, i like that comment about bar room brawls in the NEW thread…LOL!
P.S. I owe you one Acid!
for those of you completely confused…
part1 original thread https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-tu-members-leave-the-tu
part2 about why original thread was locked https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/dislikes-closing-members
part3 Manny starts a positive thread about members https://forum.tudiabetes.org/topics/why-do-you-come-back-to
Thanks for the support everyone. I was concerned that perhaps the ghost comments, as well as my insistence on ghostly recollections, could have been interpreted as negative commens and I wanted to put a positive spin on them and had the Jam song in mind the whole time. I hoped to spin them in a positive (ok, maybe a wierd positive but, well consider the source…) light? I also endeavored to stick to the terms of service because I think they are appropriate and I certianly appreciate the moderators. At the same time, as I may have mentioned before, Albert Camus reportedly had a copy of Nietzsche’s “The Gay Science”, in which FN makes fun of everything, in his valise when he was killed in the car wreck. Since I learned that, I have turned up my natural tendency to try to bring some levity to many topics, including ghastly diseases like diabetes.
Robert-
please don’t get this thread locked like the other one. I started this entire subject that has unexpectedly taken a wrong and negative turn instead of being brutally honest. Just let it go. Nuff said.
-Mikey
Did you read the values statement, Robert? In every administrative decision our team makes, that’s really all there is to it. You can champion a conspiracy theory if you really like, but the only thing that might get you banned is if you were to be warned via email enough times about your forum behavior and then continue that behavior. Those warnings are done privately, as are the suspensions.
No smoke screen. No BS. Just a team of volunteers who are upholding a community code of conduct.